Ultimate Jackie

From the book "America's Queen":

After her two experiences as the wife of rich men, Jackie was determined not to repeat it. Once, in these years, she said to her friend Aileen Mehle, "Suzy," "Why don't you write about all these very prominent social women who have married vast fortunes and who are envied high and low? How everything seems wonderful on the surface but underneath life is hell, hell, hell....."And I thought," Suzy said, "Et tu, Jackie?"

Aileen/Suzy also had the opportunity to witness firsthand just how awful Jackie's life could be during her marriage to Ari Onassis. She recounts an incident at a luncheon in Florida when Ari was "downright hostile" toward his wife. "It was no surprise to see Onassis looking rumpled as usual but Jackie had obviously been to hell and back. She wore no makeup, an unbecoming cotton dress and an odd cotton scarf tied at four corners completely covering her hair. Assured of an audience, Onassis turned on her. "Look at you!" he shouted. "How can you be seen looking like that? You don't see Aileen and Gloria (Guiness, the hostess) in that kind of get-up. What is your problem?" For a moment a look of hurt and sadness crossed Jackie's face, then she deflected the situation by smiling brightly "Yes, don't they look great?" Her "problem" was staring her in the face--her husband who by now was drunk on red wine and had stumbled to the beach, curled up in a fetal position sleeping soundly.

I think--and this is my personal opinion--the way Jackie handled this hurtful situation, by complimenting the women her husband was using to criticize her, is one of the reasons she is such an enduring icon of style and, even more importantly, grace. She seldom showed her pain, rose above the in your face philandering of two husbands, and, during her marriage to Onassis, tried--even after his depression when his son died--to ignore the way he would lash out at her and comfort him, no matter what he said or did. She earned the admiration she received--not just for the way she comported herself through the President's funeral but throughout her life, always trying her best to focus on the positive.